foodie fridays: mint chocolate monster bars

“Embark on a sweet journey with our enticing creation—Mint Chocolate Monster Bars. A divine fusion of mint and chocolate that transforms every bite into a delightful indulgence.”

Did you believe in monsters as a kid?

Monsters, as in, the scary trucker that hid in your bedroom closet and made you sleep with one eye open because you were afraid he would eat you. Yeahhhh, that monster.

I sure did. Not by choice I should say.

I blame my older brother, John. Sorry! John has an imagination for literature that I would shank someone for. He is the true author in our immediate wordsmith family so in a way I can’t completely blame him for starting his career early. I just hope I get some scrilla’ for being a test subject when his Pulitzer prize-winning novel hits the shelves someday.

Ballocks! Where was I? Yes, old trucker monsters.

My brother told me about this particular monster when I was about eight years old. I will only mention his name once because I hear he is best friends with Beatle Juice and I don’t need those two truckers tracking me down. You think I’m kidding. The monster’s name is: Sand Larver (SL). Yes, I realize it’s quite possibly the oddest monster name, but this fellow had me sleeping on my parents’ bedroom floor for about a month back in the ol’ day.

Mr. SL was a skeleton monster that wore a black, Gothic hood. He lived by the railroad tracks and prowled for kids trying to cross and would gobble them up. Horrifying, right? I stayed clear from tracks while on foot, I would close my eyes every time we drove over them in a car, and I would try to send positive thoughts to Mr. SL in hopes we would spare me.

But as they say, Youth is wasted on the young , I totally should have brought him these mint chocolate monster bars. Maybe Mr. SL was hungry? Hello, he is completely made of bones. What if he was lonely and just wanted to hang out with kids, but got hungry and ate them instead? Have you seen Augustus from Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory? What if he needed gluten free food? It would be a tragedy.

Anyways, if you are still fighting off monsters in your closet, you should definitely leave a plate of these monster bars out.

“Conclude your dessert affair with the irresistible allure of Mint Chocolate Monster Bars. A symphony of flavors that leaves your taste buds enchanted and craving more.”